I usually do a weekly blog post and send an email to my subscribers every Sunday. And I didn’t last week.
I’m so very sorry.
It was one of those stop-everything situations. A my-life-is-drastically-changing time for me.
I’m going through a breakup. (Uncertainty strikes again.)
It wasn’t my choice, but I now see that it is for the best. Still, there’s a grieving period. A mourning for losing my relationship, my best friend, and the future I thought we had together. There’s extreme discomfort in dealing with my feelings and separating our things.
But I’m letting myself feel all of it. And I mean ALL of it. I’m not trying to hide my emotions or shove them. When I feel like crying, I cry. When I’m upset with the situation, I work out to get my aggression out. When I’m numb…well…I just allow myself to be numb.
I see now that last year, when I spent months researching uncertainty, was a preparation period for me. The Universe was showing me the tools I would need for dealing with heartbreak.
So I am using these tools, and I guess I’m functioning. People tell me I’m being strong. I don’t feel strong. I feel like I’m just going through the motions.
Yet, I do feel proud. Extremely proud that I gave it my all. I loved with my whole heart and then some. And that act in itself is stepping into uncertainty in a BIG way. I allowed myself to be vulnerable and open up to love. Heck, I even opened up to love in a city that was completely new to me.
THIS is something I can celebrate. I stepped into uncertainty with him, and I’m overjoyed at the person I am today because of that!
The lesson here…even though my heart is hurting, I’m still grateful that I embraced uncertainty when it came to love.
What about you? When have you stepped into uncertainty when it came to love? What did you learn from that? Comment below to share your story.