I’ve been covering the six basic human needs that I learned on the Enter the Heart retreat in Bali. So far, I’ve shared posts on the first four needs: Certainty, Uncertainty, Significance, and Love/Connection. The fifth need is Growth. Here is the explanation behind it:
“If you’re not growing, you’re dying. Period, enough said. What happens is that we can get too tied to certainty. Many of my clients believe they are driven by love and growth. But what we’ve found out is that they are actually driven by certainty.
Subconsciously they can’t handle the uncertainty of following their dreams. So, our work is to show them how they value (not even consciously) certainty over uncertainty, growth and love. Then we reframe the question and I ask them ‘if you were love and growth driven, what new choice would you make?'” – Mastin Kipp
Mastin taught us that progress equals happiness, and that if you’re not making progress (growing), then you’re dying. When you feel stuck or in a rut, that’s when you’re not getting this need met, because you’re not growing. In a way, this entire blog series is because of this need. I was growing in Bali, but then I came home and felt stuck, because I wasn’t meeting this need (hence the name of the series, “Getting Unstuck”).
There’s a way to meet this need. You might not like it. I didn’t like it when I first learned this. Ready? You need more Uncertainty in order to grow.
That’s right. If you want to meet the need for Growth, then turn to the need for Uncertainty. Be open to it. Seek it out. In those moments that you are dealing with Uncertainty, you’ll find the Growth you’ve been looking for. I can speak from personal experience on this.
This might be a lot to take in at first, especially if you’re anything like me. At the time, I didn’t want to embrace Uncertainty. Now, Mastin was telling me that in order to grow I would HAVE to embrace Uncertainty? WHAT?! After thinking over it a few days, I finally admitted to myself that Mastin was right.
I’ve grown more in the last few months than in any other period of my life. This sabbatical definitely represents Uncertainty. Starting a business represents Uncertainty. I see a whole lot more of Uncertainty and Growth in my future, and I’m perfectly OK with that.
*This post is part of a 30-day series called “Getting Unstuck” in which I’m trying to figure out my next professional step by getting out of my comfort zone and taking on various challenges. Follow along by subscribing to my weekly email list here.